Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize