I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
