Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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