I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
