Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
