I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
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