so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
either way he was missing a nipple.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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