so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Randomize
