the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I need a beard to bite.
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