wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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