Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
you made out with another girl for some wings
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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