Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
