I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
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