i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
mondays should just be called national damage control day
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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