either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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