just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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