Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Farmville is her only friend.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize