He asked to "fluff my boner.."
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
