I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
