I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
