The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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