I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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