We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize
