STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
