who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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