it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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