I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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