he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
