Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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