What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
