I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
