Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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