I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize