WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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