i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
