tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize