I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
