Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Randomize
