This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
there is puke in my bra ... again
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
