so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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