Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
too bad you live with your parents still
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
