just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
