Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
