wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
