the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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