$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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