No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Someone shattered a urinal.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
