Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
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