Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Randomize