nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
