I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
